I Do It For Me

Its been a long road for me.

For so long I hated the way I looked. I was growing up as the “ugly friend”. I changed any and all angles to take pictures, completely convinced that anyway I could hide part of my face the better.

Well in the 7th grade, I was introduced to the magical concept that is; makeup.

Oh my sweet baby Jesus did my world change. I learned how to apply it properly, what worked for my face, (and what didn’t) and I learned about the different types. I started with eye liner, which for people who do not know, is pretty much the black line on our eyelids! I was so star struck, it came in different colors, along with different textures! And then I would apply my eye shadow, smooth and bright. I started with pretty much any color I wanted, but now I’m more of a nude shade kind of girl.

I started getting noticed for it, and I was so happy. People were complimenting me, telling me how pretty I looked and asking me where I got my makeup from. I didn’t leave the house without it. Even if I was running late, I would always take the 5 minutes out of my morning to apply the eyeliner. Even if that was all I could do. I was wearing it for the boys, so I could be seen as the “pretty friend”.

As I got older, and I started having to actually buy it myself, I stopped wearing it as much. Don’t get me wrong, I can afford the $5 bottle of liquid eyeliner, but what I can’t afford is to fork out the $32 for Sephora eye shadow. (Yes, I spent that much and it’s still painful to think about.) Slowly but surely, I would consistenly leave the house without it on.

And I still received compliments.

I was kind of surprised, I thought I was going more for a “I’m so tired” look, but to other people I was just a beautiful girl without makeup on.

So for a little while I went to the other extreme. I stopped wearing make up for about a month, I started to love my natural face. It glowed all on its own, it didn’t need any help.

But I started to miss the make up! I missed being all dolled up for no reason. There was something about transforming myself into this goddess that I just craved for. I wear make up when I want to. Not for anyone else, but I do it for me.

I think that’s where people that don’t wear make up mix up about people who do. Not everyone is wearing it to please anyone else. Maybe they once were, like I did, but there is nothing wrong with wearing make up because they just love doing it! I don’t wear it anymore for anyone. I get compliments with or without it. It’s a choice I wake up in the morning to make.

I may still have self esteem issues, but I do know with or without make up, I am beautiful.

So just remember, when you see a girl with make up on, or see a make up tutorial that you stumble across on Facebook, or YouTube, she’s doing it because she loves to, not to please you.



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